High Definition Hilarity
| ADULT: | A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle. |
| BEAUTY PARLOR: | A place where women curl up and dye. |
| CANNIBAL: | Someone who is fed up with people. |
| CHICKENS: | The only creatures you eat before they are born and after they are dead. |
| COMMITTEE: | A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours. |
| DUST: | Mud with the juice squeezed out. |
| EGOTIST: | Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation. |
| GOSSIP: | A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage. |
| HANDKERCHIEF: | Cold Storage. |
| INFLATION: | Cutting money in half without damaging the paper. |
| MOSQUITO: | An insect that makes you like flies better. |
| RAISIN: | Grape with a sunburn. |
| SECRET: | Something you tell to one person at a time. |
| TOOTHACHE: | The pain that drives you to extraction. |
| TOMORROW: | One of the greatest labor saving devices of today. |
| YAWN: | An honest opinion openly expressed. |
| WRINKLES: | Something other people have. You have character lines. |